Dont Cry Because It's Over, Smile Because It Happened

so does it ever seem like i am the only one in this thing? haha ok sorry if im boring and i know i write too much. but this thing is like therapy to me. i cant explain it, but it is. today pretty much sucked. im so sick of just forcing a smile into everything. i just want to cry and kick and scream and let it all go, but i cant. i just fake it. i almost did cry today in chem, but i forced it back. im just not happy right now. and thanks, megan, for being there for me. i love talking to you cuz i know you can relate and you never tell me what you think i want to hear. you just say it like it is and i respect you so much for that. quote...(thanks for reminding me of this one megan. as much as it sucks, its so true) dont cry because its over, smile because it happened. toodles. -sarah ps. on a slightly happier note, im getting a new cell fone, and my mom is getting me free verizon mobile to mobile minutes so i can talk to dana all i want! pps. and to continue on what i wrote about yesterday, about how i cant let go of the whole jake thing? as if to press the whole thing even harder into my head, i talked to molly today and she was telling me how she talked to him on the fone last night and how they'rr going to see him this weekend. and thats soo great, im so happy for her, because i know how much she misses him. but my God i cant get through anything without something going on with that kid. oh and she had his yearbook to sign. that was weird, knowing he'll have that thing for forever probably and what i write is like engraving in a plaque. sheesh.