Where is Me?

I feel like I haven't surfaced in weeks, which is true on some levels. I've been away from school for a long time, so I'm not surprised that things have changed, but it still kind of hit me enough to knock the wind out of me. It seems that, after years of watching everyone around me change (and not always for the better), I've started to change myself. I'm not talking about growing up...lots of people have changed, but seem to have gone backward in maturity...but change in an abstract, wanna-be-concrete way. I feel so lost sometimes, like I've lost control over everything. I wish that things were different. I wish that people cared more than they do, and then when I see my own indifference, I realize it might be for the best. Maybe it's written in the stars somewhere that when I leave for college, it will have to be on my own.